Tenant refuses to allow roommate's girlfriend, Sarah, to move in with them after roommate demands they let her stay without paying rent: ‘Sarah’s temporarily jobless and will make it up later’

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Jul 16, 2025 3:00 PM EDT

Story time!

The first place I moved to after high school was a tiny 3-bedroom apartment I had to share with 7 other roommates, and let me tell you, it was the worst. No one could agree on a system to divide up the chores, so the apartment was always dirty, the sink was constantly full of dishes, the trash cans were full, and people were always eating the food I left in the fridge. It took a lot not to run back to my parents' house and deal with the college commute, but I was convinced I could stick it out for at least one year before moving someplace with less… well, people.

My last straw was when one of the roommates decided to invite her boyfriend to stay there for almost every single night. The place was so crowded that even this one extra person was making it impossible to move around, and it was not helping that he was sleeping on the living room's couch and eating all our food. 

The only thing I could do was confront her, but she refused to stop inviting him over. So at a certain point, I simply accepted my fate.

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  • If I could go back in time, I would have set firmer boundaries and refused to give in to her entitled behavior. But since I can't do that, at least I can read stories about people in similar situations who stood up for themselves the way I couldn't.

    Exactly like the roommate in the story below…

  • 01
    Cheezburger Image 10530072832
    via M_a_y_a

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 02

    AITA for refusing to let my roommate’s girlfriend move into our apartment without paying rent?

    So, I 25 years old live in a 2- bedroom apartment with my roommate, Jake 26. We've been friends since college and split rent, utilities, and chores evenly.
    via BodyArtist601
  • 03
    Our lease is month-to-month, and we've always had bills get paid, place stays clean, no drama. About two months ago, Jake started dating Sarah 24, and she's been spending a lot of time at our place.
    via BodyArtist601
  • 04
    Like, a lot. She's here 5-6 nights a week, uses our kitchen, bathroom, Netflix, you name it. I didn't mind at first because she's nice enough, and I figured it was just the honeymoon phase.
    via BodyArtist601
  • 05
    Last week, Jake sat me down and said Sarah's lease is ending soon, and he wants her to move in with us. I was caught off guard but asked how we'd handle rent and bills.
    via BodyArtist601
  • 06
    He said Sarah's between jobs and can't afford to chip in right now, but she'd "help out with chores" really?. I pointed out that we already split chores evenly, and adding a third person means more mess, more utilities, and more strain on our small space.
    via BodyArtist601
  • 07
    I suggested Sarah pay a third of the rent and utilities once she's employed, but Jake got defensive and said I was being petty and unsupportive, He argued that since she's his girlfriend, it's not like she's a stranger, and I should be cool with it because we're all friends here.
    via BodyArtist601
  • 08
    Here's my side: I get that Sarah's in a tough spot, and I don't want to seem heartless. I've been unemployed before, and it S s. But our apartment is tiny shared bathroom, small kitchen, thin walls.
    via BodyArtist601
  • 09
    Having a third person full-time would change the vibe, and I don't think it's fair for me to subsidize her living here. I pay $800/month for my half of the rent, plus utilities, and I budget carefully.
    via BodyArtist601
  • 10
    Cheezburger Image 10530073088
    via Ugur Karakoc

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 11
    If Sarah moves in without contributing, I'm essentially covering part of her costs, which doesn't sit right with me. I also feel like Jake's dismissing my concerns by framing it as me being unfriendly rather than practical.
    via BodyArtist601
  • 12
    Jake's side, as he explained it: He says Sarah's only temporarily jobless and will make it up later. He thinks I'm overreacting because she's not some random tenant but his girlfriend, and I should trust she won't mooch forever.
    via BodyArtist601
  • 13
    He also said I'm making a big deal out of nothing since she's already here most of the time anyway. He pointed out that she's cooked dinner for us a couple of times, so she's contributing in her own way.
    via BodyArtist601
  • 14
    The conversation ended with Jake saying I'm being unreasonable and that I'm making Sarah feel unwelcome. Now things are tense, and Sarah's been avoiding me when she's over.
    via BodyArtist601
  • 15
    I don't want to ruin my friendship with Jake, but I also don't think I should have to pay for someone else to live here. AITA for putting my foot down?
    via BodyArtist601
  • 16
    CartwheelsOverClouds NTA. Jake is welcome to support his gf by paying her share until she's employed again.
    via CartwheelsOverClouds
  • 17
    VironLLA NTA, he's been dating her for two months & now he wants her to live with you guys rent-free? without even an agreement that she pay 1/3 after she find a job
    via VironLLA
  • 18
    (honestly still too generous, she may just never get another job)? nope, that's bit & possibly a violation of your lease to have her move in anyway
    via VironLLA
  • 19
    FruityMystery NTA. If you don't hold this boundary now or come to a mutually agreed upon compromise (not just you caving to their demands) they'll only take advantage of you more and more as time goes on
    via FruityMystery
  • 20
    Maximum-Ear 1745 If Jake's so confident she will make it up later then he should her contribution of the rent pay and she can pay him back. NTA
    via Maximum-Ear1745
  • 21
    BraveOpinion3289 I don't even need to finish reading this to tell you three people, everything gets paid three ways case closed
    via BraveOpinion3289
  • 22
    DSMRob Move out. You are month to month. Its going to end up going that way in a few months anyway. She will be chirping in his ear about little s' and it will strain your friendship.
    via DSMRob
  • 23
    BodyArtist601 OP Seeing a lot of comments has made me truly realized that I should set a really good boundaries, maybe I should tell Jake to ask her to stop coming to our home for now because I can see this will keep happening if no action is taken.
    via BodyArtist601

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boyfriend aita job house living together work tenant friends reddit story relationships girlfriend rent chores Reddit roommates home money
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